Wednesday, January 19, 2011

Full Bloom

Dear Lovely Readers,

I'm having an angry week. I don't get angry. But I am. It's all to do with the breakup and dealing with it, or not. Or dealing with it by eating way too much shite, and ignoring the fact that I have put on weight at an alarming rate.

This makes me angry. Because the young woman who would have by now, at least starting cutting some crap out and moving more, just can't seem to get out of this funk.

It's hard people. And no, it's not meant to be easy I know that.

I just want to eat, and fill the giant void. It's freaking huge this void. I fill it with time to think, travel plans, work, more plans, more work, some running, but still the void remains to same size.

I think maybe if I just focus any remaining energy on weight loss that would help, you know, make me feel better about myself and what I can do.

I need to find some balance, I'm exhausted, my mind is spinning, and I've never been so emotionally tired ever, nor have I eaten this much crap in such a short space of time, nor drank so much...people I'm not a huge drinker. It's not cool.

At least I have identified the problem, filling the void via food.

But what now, what do I concentrate on, without making myself more tired, but more emotionally zen!

Argh, this is so annoying.

I want my life back, I want me back!

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