After I finished work tonight, a mutual friend came around for a cup of tea, and brought along a packet of tim tams. We split, no guilts, nothing. I've got just over 100km to run this week, and for once I'm not going to beat myself up over food, and I'll make sure the points even out too.
It was good just to talk, and hang out, and cry - when I get through a day without crying, you guys will know about it first! I'm trying to remain positive, but you are going to get a few woe is me posts in the months ahead. I'm trying to work through it, and not find fault
I'm trying to find the light.
- Time is now my own, like ALL the time. I was never restricted, but I just chose happily to spend most of my time with them. Hello free time, and reconnecting with people, and just doing whatever I want.
- I don't have to buy any extra snack type things when grocery shopping, or wine. I can now spend that spare money on a beer, or a magazine, or more fruit. In saying that, if anyone intends to be a semi-regular house guest I'll always try and have something you like in the cupboard - as I generally keep all my snack stuff at work. I try and be a good host like that.
- I don't have to tidy my room, lol. No really, I do. But it doesn't need to be so neat!
- I can look more closely at going vegetarian or vegan, I just need to get through those sausages and steak in the freezer first...
- I can focus on me more, and put myself first.
It's not much but it's somewhere to start, there are lots of shite things, which I could list, but I won't. It's not going to do me or anyone any good.
I'm super busy at the moment which is great, I've got a second job for three months, and until the end of October it's all marathon marathon. I know I'll keep up with the running after the marathon, but I'm looking forward to incorporating new things too.